BeyondTheBorder

I was reading Science Daily and decided to look up BPD, just to see whats out there. I came across this article:
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/08/080807144305.htm

The researchers compared the brain activity of controls ( people without BPD ) to that of borderlines when playing a game, and found that their brain activity differs when it comes to perceiving information that comes from an interaction. Basically, borderlines have difficulty perceiving information...

Its like I'm two people in one: The Crazy me, and the normal me. The normal me is able to distinguish between real and not real. The normal me realizes that its illogical to think that everyone hates me just because they said they're sleepy, its illogical to think that no one cares when people ask about me all the time, its illogical to think that I don't have friends when I just went for a movie with a few friends... but for some reason, the normal me just can't stand up to the crazy me. The normal me can't convince the crazy me that its illogical. And the crazy me dominates.

I have my first psychiatrist appointment in a while tommorow. I don't think it'll help.

I wish someone would hug me. Sometimes thats all I want. Most of the time, thats all I want. I want someone to talk to me softly and sweetly, hug me, and tell me I'll get through this...